Let's eat Grandpa!

I finally did it. After months of hemming and hawing (I am a killer hawer) and a ton of research, I finally decided to bite the bullet and buy myself a road bike. I’ve been cycling with my friend Carolyn on a borrowed comfort mountain bike (it even had a shock absorber in the seat), but keeping up with her on her road bike was nearly impossible. In fact, it was actually impossible. I think she took a nap in the bushes at one point while I pedaled furiously to catch up.

So I went out today to test-ride some bikes. The only time I’ve been out on a road bike was a comical/near-deadly ride of Carolyn’s bike up and down her street once. This is where I learned that you must get a bike that fits you. She is nice and evenly proportioned. I, on the other hand, am all torso and no legs. I nearly killed myself tipping over the handlebars.

Drawings are to scale.

I knew I needed a bike that fit my body, and that it was going to be difficult due to my build. I hit one bike shop and they suggested a hybrid bike with straight handlebars but a road bike frame. I test rode it and liked it a lot, but wasn’t quite sure — I’d really had my heart set on a true road bike. As Ricky Bobby would say, “I wanna go fast!” I decided to hit another shop to see what they recommended. Several hours and much hawing later, Bike Kid helped me decide to get a Scattante W-570 with Shimano 150s. In addition to being a high-quality bike, it’s smokin’ hot. It fit me so well and with the sale the shop was having (the sale price of the bike + 15% off everything + 10% back in store credit), I think I got a great deal for a nice road bike. It cost less than half of what it retails for.

"I am so sexy!" -- Cori's Road Bike

Then Bike Kid (who was really helpful) spent a LONG time convincing me that I should go with the clip-in pedals that the bike came with. I’d been set on getting regular pedals, mostly because I generally try to avoid looking like an idiot and the idea of being actually attached to my bike is terrifying. But he finally convinced me that the benefits outweighed the learning curve and that I would come to appreciate being able to pull up on the pedals as well as push down. It would work more muscle groups and I wouldn’t tire as soon. Fine, Bike Kid, I’ll do it. But you’re going to pay my medical bills.

Bike Kid spent a while with me in the parking lot teaching me the ins and outs of shifting the bike, and then gave me a tutorial on how to work the clip pedals. When I got my bike home, I decided to go for a test ride. Here are some things I learned:

• You cannot avoid looking like an idiot while learning to use clip pedals.
• Getting into the clips is hard, but not impossible. Remembering to click out of them when you’re stopping is harder. However, nearly falling over gives you incentive to click out earlier next time.
• You won’t learn this until you’ve nearly fallen over several dozen times.
• You can’t click out of the pedals by moving your heel toward the bike, you must move your heel away from the bike.
• Shifting your heel inward does nothing when you are falling over.
• Your ankles can withstand a surprising amount of twisting.
• People will stare at you when you cannot work your bike.
• The bottoms of new cycling shoes are slick. So, if you are doing something as revolutionary as, say, putting your foot on the ground as you are coming to a stop, you must be aware there is a good chance you might slip and crack your [censored] on the bike’s crossbar.
• I am glad I am not a dude.

So there you have it. The first in what I hope are many adventures of road cycling. That is, if I do not maim or kill myself first.

Also, check out International Justice Mission’s 5 Weeks for Freedom bike ride. It’s a 5-week, 1800 mile bike ride that follows the path of the Underground Railroad from Alabama to New York. The riders speak in churches and other venues after riding 70+ miles each day to raise awareness and money about the issue of human trafficking around the world. This is on my “in my wildest dreams” list. Dream big or go home, right?